Worlds colliding

ONE WORLD

THE OTHER WORLD

Being home for two wonderful weeks [during which I ate lots of cheese, soaked up time with Matt and my family and friends, and it snowed—twice!] and returning to Tanzania served as a potent reminder of how the world in which I am doing my research is utterly worlds apart from the world from which I come. Thankfully the boredom and otherworldliness of two back-to-back overnight plane flights provides something of a neutral buffer that prevents complete overwhelm of worlds clashing together, but it is hard to ignore the differences.

When you consider that more than 75% of the world’s population lives a life much more similar to people in Tanzania than people in America—meaning no climate control, no running water, sporadic if any electricity—and that our global ecosystem would rapidly collapse if every person in the world consumed as many resources as your average Joe in America, it really makes me wonder if our predictable, sanitized lives with reliable power we use with abandon, water we don't usually conserve, restaurant delivery, big houses, fast cars and paved roads, and ability to get almost anything we want when we want it (provided we have the cash or the plastic, of course) is something of an unsustainable illusion. It certainly is a marked contrast to the way most Tanzanians must live. And while I believe that American consumerism and materialism are just repackaged manifestations of the universal human tendency toward greed (most Tanzanians would probably behave the same way if their country were as materially rich as America), it is shocking to realize from a distance how unconsciously and exuberantly materialistic most of us in America really are, and how detrimental that worldview can be environmentally and ethically. Even those of us who live relatively humbly, whether for reasons of relative poverty, moral rejection of consumerism, frugality, or environmentalism still have a standard of living and comfort that far outstrips that of most of the world’s inhabitants.

That having been said, it unsettles to me to admit to myself how uncomfortable I can feel on both a physical and psychic level being in Tanzania. Surely a goodly portion of that feeling is due to being far from what is “home,” what is familiar, the people I love, the language I know, the tidy streetscapes, the usual scenery. And the oppressive heat and humidity and torrential rains certainly don’t help. But another part of my discomfort stems entirely from being accustomed to a life that is much more comfortable, sanitary, and leisurely than most Tanzanians could ever afford, and to admit to myself that no matter my enthusiasm for learning about Tanzanian culture and ways of life, I am, and will always be, much more at home in America than Tanzania. That cognitive dissonance means that there is a strange—and perhaps unnecessary—guilt I feel in seeking sanctuary in the lobby of a nice air-conditioned hotel for a few hours on a Sunday, knowing that this is a luxury afforded to only a few here. I am not alone: lots of expatriates here seem to indulge—whether periodically or regularly—in luxuries, sometimes as a “coping mechanism.” The urge to soak up modern conveniences is even stronger on the eve of leaving for 5 months to live in small villages, many of them without any electricity, running water, or telecommunications access. My anthropological sensitivities have made me startled to realize how I almost unconsciously depend on and enjoy modern conveniences—air conditioning, lights that turn on when you flip a switch, flush toilets, remote controls, washing machines, blenders, computers. In some sense, these machines and ways of living have become part of Western culture. The unsustainability of it all, and the fact that I am so accustomed to these things that if given the choice, I would pick a life with quite a few of these conveniences, even though it demands an unfair proportion of the world’s resources, is troubling. I do also wonder what the end goal of development really is -- and doubt that the world will really be a better place if it becomes more like America!